do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
