And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
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