Christians are straight up FREAKS
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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