grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize