me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
