I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Randomize
