I wannas sexs uuuuu
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize