I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
