He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I think people are normalizing furries
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
