I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
