I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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