Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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