Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
