I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
