i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
