My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
