we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
