Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize