Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize