you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
