he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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