we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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