She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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