so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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