My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
