I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
