I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
