have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
