Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Even my vagina gasped.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
