Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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