exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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