glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize