if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
