i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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