so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize