Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
