laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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