: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
