Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
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