Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Randomize
