my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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