He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Randomize
