oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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