Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
