In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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