I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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