My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
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