Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
