speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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