Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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