you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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