Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
