then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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